Heat 90 Pacers 79 Heat lead 3-2

6 Thoughts

1) He got here in 2003, and he's meant as much to this franchise as anyone.  He's iconic amongst his team's fan base in a way few athletes ever become - he is the Heat, and the Heat are him.  Time has robbed him of a significant portion of his skills, but tonight, when his team needed him desperately, he delivered a game-saving performance.  Dwyaaannnnneee Waaa- nah, dude. UD.  Kick-started the Heat in the third quarter with a putback in traffic, then a blow-by tomahawk slam on Roy Hibbert to give the Heat a lead.  Later in the third, during a frenzied stretch in which the Heat blew the game open, he spaced the floor out to the left baseline, and dropped three straight vintage UD rainbow jumpers.  Then, in the waning moments of the fourth quarter, snuffed out the last Pacers surge by swishing another baseline jumper, and drawing a charge on Lance Stephenson.  Ballgame.  8-9 for 16 points for Udonis.  Some day when that #40 is hanging from the rafters, you can think about this game a little and smile...Let it fly.

2) Let's be honest: the Heat have a huge problem right now.  Realistically, you probably can not win an NBA championship with KJ James, Udonis Haslem, and Mario "Emcee" Chalmers as your three best players, no matter how consistently terrific Almario Vernard is, and no matter how I wear his t-shirt during these playoff games (tonight with a long-sleeve Polo pullover underneath, in a tribute to my cousin Josh who, as kids, used to wear a Red Sox three quarter sleeve batting jersey over a buttondown plaid dress shirt - sweet look!).  KJ James tried something similar for years in Cleveland - it doesn't work.  But that's where we are right now.  Udonis saved the day, and Emcee (12 points, 6 assists) was the only kid who showed up in the first half, penetrating and scoring to keep Miami hanging around during a half in which they played horribly.  James took the first half off - it looked like he knew it was going to take a do-it-all Herculean effort from him down the stretch for Miami to win, and he bided (word?) his time and conserved energy for as long as he could.  He outscored Indiana in the third quarter 16-13, and also repeatedly got middle and found shooters (usually UD) - 4 assists.  He, UD, and Mario generated almost all the offense...You know what is odd?  Pacer fan/Heat hater and TNT analyst Steve Kerr spent all game bitching about some real or perceived wrong that was foisted upon his beloved Pacers - at one point, KJ James dribbled over a screen, DJ Augustin took a weird foul by whacking James across the chest as he dribbled by, James didn't whip his head (aka "The Derrick Rose"), or stagger ("The George Hill"), or do anything except square up and continue the play as the ref blew the whistle and called the obvious foul.  Even Augustin didn't argue - it was a foul, it was kind of pointless, and everyone was prepared to move on.  Except for Steve Kerr: not ready to move on!  As they showed the replay, Kerr sneered and smirked out a "oh yeah, I'm sure little DJ Augustin can make James fall like that..."  But James didn't fall, he didn't do anything except continue to play until the whistle stopped him.  He didn't even mean-mug the referee or Augustin like David West does after anyone touches him (more on that down in #5).  But Kerr never stopped, he was on James all night.  Then, in the fourth quarter, as the Heat continued to hammer Indiana, he switched tactics to a "Miami is totally reliant on James" kind of strategy, implying that the Heat couldn't win the game without KJ, as if that was some kind of criticism.  Umm, duh?  Steve Kerr does realize that KJ James is on the Heat, right?  He's part of the team - it's not KJ James, and then there are 14 other guys unrelated to him.  In fact, I would almost argue, Steve Kerr, that's why the Heat got James in the first place, to help them win games cuz he's super-good.  What a weird, super-douchey meltdown during the playoffs from Steve Kerr.  He's less objective than all-time Pacer great Reggie Miller (who's really more "dopey" than "biased").  Great head of hair on Kerr, though, can't say I'm not jealous.

3) Both Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh looked out of it.  Wade can't move at all - he doing that thing where all his shots are running throws, and when he does shoot a jumper, he can't get off the floor at all, so he just leans back and splays his legs to try to generate some oompf.  He was terrible.  Bosh sprained his ankle in Game 3, and looked very limited tonight.  His gait looked even more dainty than normal.  They were a combined 6-15, and that's probably not going to be good enough to win most nights in the playoffs.  They did grab a combined 11 rebounds, and Dwyane added 4 assists, but their health is very troubling.  Even if they get out of this series, it's hard to imagine beating San Antonio with these two guys as hobbled as they are right now.  Yikes.

4) Miami won the game on the defensive end.  They held Indiana to 45% from the floor (still not great), but only allowed 6 offensive rebounds and 15 free throws.  The more the refs let the game get athletic, the more it benefits Miami, obviously.  Miami started trapping hard in the third quarter, and doubling quickly on the Pacers bigs.  It's not the way the Heat prefer to play, but they had to scramble the game somehow - letting Hibbert and David West back their way into the lane for 9 seconds, then turn and plop the ball into the hoop, apparently became tiresome for Coach Spo and they switched strategies.  On this night, the scrambling worked: Indiana's second half offense boiled down to "Paul George either makes a long, contested jumper, or throws a pass directly out of bounds."  Hibbert was great again with 8-14 for 22 points, but had only 2 offensive boards, and was quiet in the second half.  Defensive play of the game?  When David West caught the ball on the left wing, lowered his shoulder into Chris Bosh, drove him seven steps sideways into the lane - without dribbling, by the way - missed his runner because he was too busy traveling and shoving Bosh, grabbed his own rebound, pushed Bosh again with his right arm, tried to flip it back in with his left hand, and 6'1" Norris Cole came flying in and absolutely hammered that weak-ass poop out of the sky.  Mr. West?  It was just one aggressive defensive play out of many in the second half.  But it was a really, really satisfying one play.

5) Altercations!  Well, Birdman's streak of 130 made shots in a row, or whatever, is destined to live another night, because it seems unlikely he'll be playing in Game 6.  He got shoved in the back by Paul George on a rebound in the second quarter, turned around, saw Tyler Hansbrough and assumed Hansbrough had been the offending pusher - seemed like a safe bet at the time, that really was the logical assumption to make - ran over to Hansbrough, and bodychecked him.  Hansbrough saw him coming, and went down flailing like a baby bird who'd been hurled out of the nest by his momma.  In a series marred by "flop talk," it was the biggest flop of all.  They got up, squared off, Bird shoved him hard, and was going back after him for more until a team of refs and Heat security personnel pulled him back to the bench.  Hard to believe he won't be suspended.  Also, to add insult to injury, Reggie Miller Hubie'd him with a "Chris Birdman"..In third quarter, big, tough David West went after little Mario Chalmers and got in his face, daring him to do something, while Chalmers did what he always does, which is to look off into space and dream about video games (that's between 60-80% of his normal day).  He couldn't have been less intimidated - he, and everyone else in the NBA, has seen West's act before.  If West really wanted to fight, Chalmers is standing right there in front of him - why doesn't he take his shot?  All West wants to do is get in your face, and dare you to do something, as if you weren't just standing there minding your business when he ran up on you.  Loser.  Udonis quickly inserted himself into the situation - that's his job, West outweighs Chalmers by 60 pounds, at least - and West didn't want any of that either.  He kept talking, but that's it.  Blah, blah, blah.  Udonis would rip that kid apart, limb from limb.  Jesus Christ, David West: man up and take your shot at UD, or shut up.  You look like the biggest puss in the NBA.  Or, really, just grow up...Finally, Lance Stephenson threw a cheap elbow into Wade's mouth late in the game, which electro-shocked Dwyane into instantly driving and scoring on the other end, the one play he made all night.  Those two have been whacking at each other all series.  

6) Can you imagine: me in the Olympics, doing my thing, winning that 100 yard swimming thing, going up on that podium, getting my little gold medal, whatever...And then marrying Lolo Jones...For real...Look, here's me and Lolo at tonight's game, look at how in love with me she looks!  I love you, Lolo, I'll see you when I get off work tomorrow!  You want to get home-brewed beers at the Due South, or go to Juice Berry for a Tuna Melt?  You don't have to decide now...


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Game 6 is Saturday night in Indiana, aka the "Show Me" state.  Based on how Dwyane and Chris looked tonight, I think it's fairly safe to assume we'll be back for Game 7 on Monday in Miami.  Saturday is M.Minutos' birthday, though, if anyone can bring the magic, it's either her, or UD and Mario Chalmers!  If you need me before Saturday, I'll be loloing...
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Pacers 99 Heat 92 tied 2-2

6 Thoughts

1) Honestly?  I'm not even that frustrated.  When you see at the outset that Joey Crawford is reffing the game, you know that something aberrant is probably going to happen one way or another.  You either get through it, or you don't.  Right now is not really the time to spend a lot of time complaining about the two tough calls he made that went against Miami right at the end (or the bizarre policy that out of bounds plays are reviewable, but those two calls are not).  We have noted them, now let's move on.  The reality is that if anyone on Miami gets a defensive rebound or two at any point in the fourth quarter, the Heat probably win the game.  They didn't, on the whole Miami got the split in Indiana that they needed, and if the Heat take care of home court, they will win the series.  Honestly, look at the bright side: the fact that Joey Crawford refereed tonight's game means he can't be refereeing Thursday's game.  I hope.  That's not possible, that's against the rules, right?  Come on, come on, let's get through it quickly (and also, time to wash the Chalmers shirt)...

2) Man, Miami played poorly, they played with a pretty low level of intensity.  They tried to win this game in "normal" mode, with KJ James directing offense from the top, rather than from the block, and by offsetting their pedestrian, at best, rebounding, by out shooting the other team.  Didn't work.  The Heat shot under 40% from the floor for only the third time all season (39%).  Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh made a combined 6-21, and Ray Allen made 4-13.  Dwyane was also fairly comatose on defense - lost Lance Stephenson on the huge triple to end the third quarter.  Inexcusable defense on that play.  Also, Chris and Dwyane only had 6 combined rebounds in 67 minutes.  KJ James was more "good" than "great," but he made numerous big plays to keep the Heat in it all night long - he just didn't get enough help from those two to get the Heat over the hump.  Dwyane was not crisp - kicked the ball around a lot, missed some layups.  Think crisp, Dwyane!  Like a freshly cut carrot, or a Triscuit!  Crisp!!! 

3) You know who was crisp?  Mario "Emcee" Chalmers!  He never ceases to amaze.  He seems to be the one guy who has timed up Hibbert.  He's able to penetrate and consistently flip layups and runners over the big guy, or to take it to the rim and draw fouls.  There's a lot of big dudes in Alaska, you think Chalmers didn't have to deal with 7'2", slow-talking behemoths up there?  Mario scored 20 on 14 shots and didn't turn the ball over for the second straight game.  In fact, the Heat only turned it over 6 times - that part was fine.  I don't want to say that my Mario Chalmers t-shirt is the only reason for Chalmers' excellent play of late, but it's pretty clearly the biggest factor.  Don't blame the shirt for the loss, the shirt can't rebound - it's a shirt, what the hell is wrong with you, of course it can't rebound!...I'd like to see the shirt fight Joey Crawford...

4) None of David West's screens tonight were illegal, and he never lightly pushed anyone after getting a rebound.  Oh, and Roy Hibbert got called for a foul every time he contested a play at the rim with both hands up in the air.  KJ James could really learn a lot from those two guys...Couldn't resist.  Let's move on! 

5) Great Friend of the Blog, and vacationing Celtic fan, WebMinutos, writes in to say, "I don't understand how [Indiana Pacers broadcaster] Reggie Miller's ears fit inside those headphones?"  Those were not headphones, those were frisbees - Reggie, Steve Kerr, and Marv Albert like to play a quick game of ultimate during halftime.  Reggie won tonight's game, but I don't even respect him at all, because he was flopping a lot.  Flopping is ruining ultimate frisbee, I probably won't even watch it anymore.  

6) My Top Five Favorite Action Movie Stars:
         
          5) Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson
          4) Vin Diesel
          3) Ludacris and Tyrese Gibson (tie)
          2) Paul Walker
          1) Wolf Jackman.  What?  Oh.  Hugh Jackman.
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Okay, that was a quick one, just have to let it go and get back at it on Thursday.  If you need me before then, I will not be watching a Hugh Jackman film.  To my knowledge, I have never seen any Hugh Jackman film.  If I did, I was not aware that the guy I was watching was Hugh Jackman.  Who the hell is Hugh Jackman, and is he as boring as he looks?  See you, Thursday!
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Miami HEAT Offense is SkyNet

The Miami HEAT offense improved in each game of the 2013 Eastern Conference Finals. What's in store for Game 4?

Coach Erik Spoelstra said the Miami HEAT were focused on getting to their identity in Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Finals against the Indiana Pacers and they got the closest they've been since the series started. The HEAT offense led the NBA this season by scoring an average of 1.01 points per play. The Pacers defense led the NBA by allowing 0.83 points per play. Here's how the offense progressed over the first 3 games of the ECF (stats from mysynergysports.com):

• Game 1: 0.89 points per play


• Game 2: 0.94 points per play


• Game 3: 1.21 points per play

The HEAT offense is systematically learning to beat the Pacers defense as it works its way back to its identity. The HEAT scored 74% of their points this season off the following 5 types of plays (listed in order of points scored):

1. Spot-Up


2. Transition


3. Pick & Roll, Ball Handler


4. Cut


5. Isolation

Here's the percentage of points the HEAT scored from those 5 play types in Games 1-3 of the ECF:

• Game 1: 74%


• Game 2: 67%


• Game 3: 56%

From this perspective, it looks like the HEAT offense is getting away from its identity, but it's really like a liquid aluminum terminator shape-shifting to become a more lethal and efficient machine against the Pacers defense.

The spreadsheet below ranks the HEAT's offensive plays by points scored for the season and each game in the ECF. Plays that rank within 1 spot of where they would be expected to rank based on the HEAT offense and Pacers defense this season are marked with a 'Y'. Plays where the HEAT offense averaged more points in the ECF than the Pacers defense allowed this season are highlighted in green and plays that averaged less are highlighted in red.

Here's a summary of how the HEAT's offense performed, based on its identity in Games 1-3:

• Game 1: Ran 5/10 play types to identity, scored above average on 4/10


• Game 2: Ran 7/10 play types to identity, scored above average on 8/10


• Game 3: Ran 7/11 play types to identity, scored above average on 9/11

The 2 types of plays the HEAT haven't consistently ran to their identity are transition and isolation. If they learn to execute those as part of their attack, there's no way the Pacers can win if the defense continues to improve, too. The HEAT offense appears to be programmed to eliminate the Pacers in 5 games.

LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Miami HEAT Let Pacers Know the Series Is Over

LeBron James and Dwyane Wade led the HEAT to a dominant Game 3 performance with indicators they can play even better in Games 4 and 5.



Before Game 3, it looked like defense and turnovers were the areas that needed improvement in order for the HEAT to win Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Finals. They made some improvements in those areas but a big improvement on offense to score with 58% shooting efficiency and blow the Pacers off their home floor.



After all the White Noise that the HEAT were in trouble after Game 2, the real signal sent in Game 3 is they can still make improvements on defense against George Hill and do a better job of keeping Paul George off the free throw line.



That means the blowouts have just begun and this series is over. I'll let the numbers do the explaining...



This article uses the Estimated Wins Produced statistic created by sports economist David Berri. Average players increase a team's chance of winning 10% by producing 0.100 Estimated Wins per 48 minutes (Est.WP48) because an average NBA team produces a 0.500 winning percentage. See the HEAT Produced Page for more information.

LeBron was the most productive player in the game. He increased the HEAT's chance of winning Game 3 by 27% with an aggressive attack against Paul George on offense and defense.



Offensively, LeBron's shooting efficiency was below 50%, but he attacked George with at least 10 post-ups in Game 3 after posting him up just 3 times each in Games 1 and 2 (according to mysyngergysports.com). Most importantly, LeBron had 0 turnovers. He may not have another game without a turnover, but LeBron can definitely shoot better. His average shooting efficiency for the series was 65% in Miami.



Defensively, LeBron held George to 1 bucket and 3 turnovers in 8 plays with no fouls. Some of George's poor offense came down to just missing shots, but LeBron defended him more plays than any other HEAT player and the HEAT got the results they wanted. According to mysynergysports.com, LeBron guarded George on 8 plays, Wade 7 plays, Ray Allen 3 plays and Mario Chalmers 1 play. The end result was that George's poor production decreased the Pacers' chance of winning Game 3 by 1%. That's an 11% swing from the production George provided when the Pacers won Game 2.

Dwyane Wade was the 2nd most productive player in the game. He increased the HEAT's chance of winning Game 3 by 24% with 18 points, 57% shooting efficiency, 8 assists, just 2 turnovers, 2 blocks and 1 steal. While he was dominant offensively, on defense Wade continued to struggle keeping George off the free throw line. He committed 2 fouls for 4 free throw attempts in 7 defensive plays.

The other part of the HEAT defense that needed improvement was at point guard. George Hill's shooting efficiency was much higher than what the HEAT typically allowed from opposing PGs during the season. Hill scored 19 points with 65% shooting efficiency in Game 3, but he only increased the Pacer's chance of winning by 6% - that's a 28% drop from Game 2 when LeBron called him the X-Factor.

How did the HEAT limit Hill's impact on Game 3 if they didn't limit his shooting efficiency? Mario Chalmers did it by playing an even better offensive game than Hill did. 'Rio scored 14 points with 75% shooting efficiency and committed no turnovers to increase the HEAT's chance of winning Game 3 by 10%. Cole also committed no turnovers after leading the team in turnover rate the first 2 games of the series.



The biggest change from Game 2 to Game 3 was the production at power forward. HEAT PFs only increased the team's chance of winning by 4% in Games 1 and 2, but they increased the team's chance of winning Game 3 by 24% thanks to Udonis Haslem.



UD increased the HEAT's chance of winning by 21% by knocking down all but one of the open baseline jumpers Roy Hibbert gave him (89% shooting efficiency). UD may not shoot like that again, but the Pacers defense will have to adjust to him as an offensive threat on the floor. How UD and the HEAT attack those adjustments could lead to even more problems for Indiana in Game 4.

The spreadsheet below lists the wins produced stats estimated for all players from the boxscore for Game 3.

Boxscore and play-by-play stats from NBA.com and PopcornMachine.net.

Heat 114 Pacers 96 Heat lead 2-1

6 Thoughts

1) It's amazing how much easier basketball is when the ball goes in...and your Mario Chalmers t-shit is freshly washed!  Emcee Chalmers' #15 bounced out of the dryer 3 minutes before game-time, and avenged it's first loss.  Now 6-1 in these playoffs - MARIO CHALMERS SHIRT POWER!  Very important people in the Pacers organization - and by "very important people," I mean "Pacers radio announcer Mark Boyle" - criticized Heat fans after Game 2.  I believe he used the word "losers" to describe Heat fans who left early during the loss.  Tonight, when Pacers fans evacuated the arena with 3 minutes to go like Bob Evans was offering free cheese fries until midnight, obviously Mark Boyle was all over them, right?  Umm, no.  Crickets.  I mean, crickets...except for the very, very conspicuous "Let's go Heat" chants ringing throughout the otherwise empty building!  Pacers are 25th in attendance - I guess there were a lot of tickets available for Miami's loser fans.  Let's go, let's let it fly, let's do what needs to be done - feels so much better to win than lose!

2) Early on in this game, King James took Paul George to the block and beat him up.  Backed him down on the left block, turned over the right shoulder, and banked in left-handed jump hooks.   Faked the same move, stepped through, and beat the help to the rim.  Found cutters, and threw the ball back out to shooters over help.  Drove against the halftime clock and made a running 12 foot floater to end the half while being body-checked by Roy Hibbert (of course, no foul - why would there be a foul, it's KJ James...).Went back out top, made a dribble handoff to Ray Allen, screened two dudes, and Allen hit a three.  Spent time on both Paul George and Lance Stevenson, and helped hold those two guys to a combined 5-20.  He scored 18 in the first half, when it was still a game, and spent the second half monitoring things, directing traffic from the top.  His 22, 4, and 3 is a quiet stat line from him, but I'm not sure he could have dominated the game much more thoroughly.  Not too much went on out there tonight that wasn't greatly affected by his presence.  Numbers don't aways tell the whole story.

3) But sometimes they tell a big part of the story...KJ James was dominant in the first two games as well, but didn't get any help.  Tonight?  HE GOT ALL THE HELP!  Dwyane Wade wound his way to the middle, pulled up in the paint, and made polite little jump hooks over Hibbert, and then, once he had him back peddling, found open teammates: 8-14 for 18 points, with 8 assists by Wade...The teammate he found on his drives?  Udonis Haslem!  UD, with everyone calling for his starting job, and his minutes in general, spaced out to the baseline, caught kickouts when Hibbert sank to the paint, and drilled jumpers.  Three in a row to start the game, then threw in a running hookshot over Hibbert, then cut baseline, caught a pass from James, and took a hit from Hibbert as he powered the ball in.  It was vintage UD, at least for one more night: 8-9, for 17 points, and 7 boards...And, maybe most importantly, Mario "Emcee" Chalmers scored 14 on 4-6, including back-to-back huge buckets in the third quarter during the Pacers only real run of the game.  His drive-and-finish through a George Hill bodycheck stretched the lead back to double digits, and kind of ended the drama.  And if you think that Chalmers was inspired by my newly cleaned t-shirt, you would be spot on - every player like to smell fresh (except Roy Hibbert, probably - that dude looks like he smells like butt; good player, yes - looks like he smells like absolute butt).

4) Play of the game: as we said, the first two games of this series, nothing went right for Miami.  Indiana is a fantastic defensive teams - much credit to them - but Miami shot it poorly from the line, poorly from distance, and kept turning it over.  Tonight was the opposite: even the bad plays worked out.  With the Heat pouring it on late in the third quarter, KJ screened, rolled down the lane free, Norris Cole burned a perfect bullet into him, and it went right through James' hands...into the hands of a soaring Birdmandersen, who caught it and flushed it to send M.Minutos into an extended bird-flap (one flap only for me).  Bird went for 9 and 9 with 2 blocks in 22 minutes. Not in my wildest dreams, dude...

5) Neither Dwyane Wade (leaping karate chop to Lance Stevenson's head) nor David West (vicious cheap shot elbow to Mario Chalmers' injured shoulder...which West injured with a cheap shot screen, by the way) were suspended.  Dwyane got back to basketball, trying to recapture an acceptable baseline of efficiency.  West, on the other hand, got back to arguing, petulantly scowling at the refs, his opponents, and even his own teammates when he was displeased with some real or imagined transgression.  He's an excellent player - had another great game with 21 and 10 - but an atrocious teammate, and the dirtiest non-Artest player in the league.  He generally douched it up all night long - one thing about him, he's a huge front runner.  When things are going well, he's very "la-di-da!" but when things turn for the worse, he starts bitching at everyone around him, and throwing wild elbows - you can literally watch him melt down out there.  In the third quarter, with the game almost gone, he committed ridiculous back-to-back fouls on Battier: (another) needless elbow whistled at him, and then grabbed him around the neck on a rebound and threw him down.  Absurd.  Imagine encountering him in normal life, you'd be, like, waiting in line to pay for your Mennen Speed Stick at Target - you know, cuz you're smelling like Hibbert's booty a little (hey, it's okay, it's hot in Florida this time of year) - and you got West in behind you in line, like his forearm planted in your lower back, pushing you forward into the lady with the diapers in front of you, while he's mean-mugging and screaming at the cashier, "Hey - this the express lane!"  This is definitely the guy in your circle of friends that no one likes because his act is embarrassing, but no one ever says anything to him, because it's not worth the 2 hour argument you're gonna have when he's trying to tell you why he was right to curse at the waitress in the TGIF's he insisted you all go to for lunch...You're a grown-ass man, David West, goodness gracious.

6) Got a brochure in the mail from a company called Fresh Diet.  It is a company that delivers meals to your door.  Man, this sounds terrific, it isn't like a lot of meal delivery plans where the food may not be optimally fresh.  Fresh Diet's meals are "never heavily processed, vacuum-packed, or frozen," and they will be waiting on my doorstep each morning when I wake up.  Wow - I really like fresh food!  According to the brochure, Forbes Magazine calls Fresh Diet one of "America's top 20 most promising companies," and Gayle King, Oprah's best friend, exclaims "every time I pick out my meals, my mouth does a happy dance!"  I'm starting to think this is for me, I could really use the convenience of someone preparing my meals for me, the menus are nutritional, and the cost is not prohibitive.  Look at this sample menu: Apricot Cream Cheese Crepes for breakfast; Asian-Style Chicken Salad for lunch; and Turkey Chili Con Carne for dinner!  Delicious!  And for dessert, Chocolate Dipped Strawberries with Creamy Vanilla Ricotta Chee- whoa, whoa, WHOA!  What the freak?!?  Are you trying to kill me, Fresh Diet?  Ricotta cheese?  Blechhhh-yyyy, ricotta cheese is the most vile food stuff in existence, no human palate can survive the soft, stinky disgustingness of ricotta cheese ("disgustingness," probably not a word, I acknowledge).  Good God, this Fresh Diet is a menace, this meal plan is only for people who really, really hate good food, or themselves, or both, or who drive a Kia Rondo...
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Game 4 is Tuesday night.  If you need me before then, I definitely won't be re-living the hightlights of Fast and Furious 6 in my mind, because how could I, since I can't see that film, since I'm an adult with a college education?  It's really more for like, ummm,  well, I'm just gonna say it: Pacers fans...So I definitely won't be thinking about Vin Diesel's heroic pursuit of Michelle Rodriguez, including the most dramatic "flying car catch" of all-time.  And I won't be thinking about the hilarious hijinks perpetrated by Tyrese and Ludacris, who never lose their respective joie de vivres, even in impossibly dangerous situations.  And I absolutely won't be dreaming of Paul Walker's dreamy blue-eyed heroic gesture to get himself inserted into a maximum security prison, just to try to help make amends for an earlier mistake that he made in one of the other Fast and Furious movies which, of course, I did not see.  Don't do it, Paul Walker - I love you, boy!  Do you know what can happen to a guy like you in prison?  I LOVE YOU, BOY!!!...See you all Tuesday, even Mark Boyle!
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HEAT Need to Improve Defense & Turnovers to Defeat the Pacers

LeBron James' brilliant performance in Game 2 was ruined by poor defense and turnovers. The HEAT need to improve those areas if they want to win Game 3 and the series.



4 Factors impact the outcome of a basketball game: shooting, turnovers, offensive rebounds and free throws. The HEAT lost all 4 of those factors to the Pacers in Game 2. In order for the HEAT to make a 3rd consecutive Finals appearance, the defense needs to improve against the Pacers' shooting, force the tempo to create turnovers and keep them off the line. The HEAT offense needs to cut down on it's turnovers. Let's get into the numbers to explain...



This article uses the Estimated Wins Produced statistic created by sports economist David Berri. Average players increase a team's chance of winning 10% by producing 0.100 Estimated Wins per 48 minutes (Est.WP48) because an average NBA team produces a 0.500 winning percentage. See the HEAT Produced Page for more information.



Defense

The Pacers are shooting with 50% efficiency against a HEAT defense that ranked 9th in shooting efficiency allowed this season at 48.7%. The league average shooting efficiency was 49.6%. The Pacers ranked 22nd in shooting efficiency during the regular season with a below average 47.9%. The defense has to improve.



LeBron James called George Hill the X-factor in Game 2 and his shooting efficiency was a big reason for that. Hill shot 6-8 from the floor and led the Pacers in estimated wins produced by increasing the team's chance to win Game 2 by 34%.



The HEAT only allowed 48% shooting efficiency by point guards during the regular season, but are allowing the Pacers PGs to average 59.5% shooting efficiency after Hill's Game 2 effort. Hill only shot 2-9 from the floor in Game 1. If the HEAT held Hill to the 48% shooting efficiency they normally allow, it would have decreased the Pacers' chance of winning Game 2 by 18%. Mario Chalmers and the HEAT defense need to get back to that for a chance to win Game 3 and, more importantly, the series.



The other Pacer the HEAT defense needs to improve against is Paul George. He averaged 49% shooting efficiency during the season but is scoring with a 56% shooting efficiency against the HEAT in the Eastern Conference Finals. Dwyane Wade starts off games defending George, but he and LeBron James switch on and off him during the game. George made 6 of his 9 shots in Game 2 with LeBron defending him (based on video from mysynergysports.com). Only 4 of George's shots have been scored on Wade so far.



George's production in Game 2 increased the Pacers' chance of winning by 12%. If the HEAT held George to his season average for shooting efficiency in Game 2, it would have decreased the Pacers' chance of winning Game 2 by 10%. That change wouldn't have been a big enough difference for the HEAT to win the game, but every little bit helps in a series where the first two games came down to the last two possessions.



The problem with Wade guarding George is that he's put the Most Improved Player on the line for 12 free throws while LeBron has only put him on the line for 1 so far. 10 of those free throw attempts from Wade came in Game 1, when he fouled out. He only put George on the line twice in Game 2. George averaged 4 free throw attempts per 48 minutes during the regular season but is averaging twice that in the Eastern Conference Finals. It's important that Wade and LeBron find a balance between contesting George's shots while keeping him off the line to give the HEAT a larger margin of error to win Game 3 and the series.



The other part of the defense that needs to be addressed is tempo. The Pacers have committed less turnovers than the HEAT despite ranking 27th in turnover percentage this season. The HEAT picked up the  Pacers fullcourt for most of the 2nd, 3rd and 4th quarters but the energy applied to the press varied and it didn't result in any overall success. The HEAT could turn the pressure up on the press, but the fact of the matter is the Pacers PGs averaged the fewest turnovers in the NBA this season. Trapping the ball to get it out of the PG's hand and force more turnover-prone players to make decisions could result in turnovers the HEAT can exploit to get out on the break. Traps in the halfcourt could also be effective when the Pacers post-up David West or let Paul George initiate the offense. Whether it's with a press or a trap, the HEAT have to find a way to increase the tempo of the game.



Turnovers

Turning the ball over against the Pacers is suicide for the HEAT. They can't give the Pacers extra plays with offensive rebounds while giving themselves less opportunities by turning the ball over. Case in point: LeBron James in Game 2.



LeBron increased the HEAT's chance of winning Game 2 by 52% but threw it away with 2 turnovers at the end of the game. Of course, the game wouldn't have come down to those last two possessions if LeBron's HEAT teammates gave him any support in the game. Birdman aka Chris Andersen and Mike Miller were the only other players that made a positive impact on the HEAT's chance of winning Game 2.



Miller's 3 before the buzzer at halftime increased the HEAT's chance of winning by 6% and his chance of getting injured by 100%. Birdman increased the team's chance of winning by 9%, but he was only on the floor for 1.4 minutes in the 4th quarter because he hit his 15-minute limit playing for an extended stretch in the 2nd quarter after Chris Bosh got his 3rd foul. Bosh needs to stay out of foul trouble so he AND Birdman can stay on the floor when the HEAT need them. Bosh's performance decreased the HEAT's chance of winning Game 2 by 10%. His 17 points on 50% shooting efficiency with 5 rebounds was dwarfed by Roy Hibbert's 29 points on 67% shooting efficiency with 10 rebounds. Hibbert increased the Pacers' chance of winning Game 2 by 20%.



As bad as Bosh was outplayed in Game 2, he wasn't the least productive HEAT player. Norris Cole decreased the HEAT's chance of winning by 15% in Game 2 despite only playing 19 minutes. Cole committed 5 turnovers in Game 1 but only 1 in Game 2. In Game 2, the problem was that he shot 1-6 from the floor and finished with 0 assists while George Hill dominated the PG position in the game.



The only value Cole brings to this series comes from applying pressure with pressing and trapping. The problem with that is his value's limited because he won't be able to turn the Pacers' point guards over enough. Taking all that into consideration, Cole should be benched for the rest of this series. He leads the rotation in turnovers with an average of 6.1 per 48 minutes and his shooting efficiency is in the toilet at 25%.



Erik Spoelstra should put Cole under glass and only break it in an emergency if the HEAT need to apply pressure on the ball.



The spreadsheet below lists the wins produced stats estimated for all players from the boxscore for Game 2.

Old Man Swag: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Invented It, Tim Duncan's Just the Latest Living It

Tim Duncan had a great Game 3 against the Memphis Grizzlies to put the Spurs up 3-0 in the Western Conference Finals, but his old man swag can't compare to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, the NBA's all-time scoring leader.

#IdioticTweetOfTheDay RT @sherwoodstrauss: Has there been a better middle aged player than Tim Duncan?

— reservoirgod (@MIA_Heat_Index) May 26, 2013

A dumbass tweet inspired this post.



My first NBA memory is Kareem winning MVP of the 1985 Finals at 38 years old after averaging 26 points and 9 rebounds against 1 of the greatest frontlines in NBA history with Larry Bird, Kevin McHale and Robert Parish (3 hall of famers). The tweet above was sent after Duncan (37 years-old) put up 24 points, 10 rebounds and 5 assists in a Western Conference Finals game against Marc Gasol and Zach Randolph (3 all-star seasons combined in their careers).



Below is a comparison of the regular season stats for Kareem and Duncan from their 16th years in the NBA.

Kareem wasn't necessarily a better middle-aged player than Duncan in his 16th regular season, but he was his equal. Both players produced a 12.5 Win Score per 48 Minutes (WS48) in the regular season. Win Score is a stat created by sports economist David Berri to measure NBA player's production based on their stats from the boxscore. The simple formula is PTS-FGA-FTA/2+OREB+AST/2-TOV+DREB/2+STL+BLK/2-PF/2. See the HEAT Produced Page for more information.



But this post was inspired by a tweet after a playoff game. Below is a comparison of the playoff stats for Kareem and Duncan from their 16th seasons in the NBA.

Kareem produced a 12.6 WS48 in the 1985 playoffs while Duncan only produced a 7.4 WS48 in the 2013 playoffs before Game 3 of the WCF. As always, the playoffs separate the great from the #ChildrenOfALesserGod.

Kareem's 1985 playoff run is arguably the greatest postseason performance by a middle-aged player in modern NBA history while Duncan's performance in the 2013 playoffs ranks behind performances by John Stockton, Robert Parish, Kevin Garnett and Jason Kidd after 16 or more seasons in the league. The spreadsheet below lists the most productive playoff performances by middle-aged players ranked by WS48.

The last point about Kareem vs. Duncan has nothing to do with basketball but everything to do with Old Man Swag. Duncan hired a private investigator to follow his wife. Kareem was Big Pimpin' with Pam Grier.

Now THAT'S Old Man Swag.

Pacers 97 Heat 93 tied 1-1

6 Thoughts

1) Tough loss.  Besides King James James (Hubiesm), no one on Miami could make a shot all night long - not a triple, not a layup, not a free throw.  Then, just when James willed them into the game, and Chris Bosh hit a huge triple (someone made a shot!) to give Miami a little cushion, Dwyane Wade made four horrific decisions down the stretch, and the Heat unraveled to the point where the game ended with mindless back-to-back James turnovers.  The bright side?  Time to wash the Mario Chalmers Shirt!  Let's get through it...

2) When Bosh hit a three from the left wing to give Miami a 4 point lead with 6 minutes to go, it looked like King James had held the fort jussttt long enough for the cavalry to arrive.  But wide open triple misses by Bosh and Ray Allen sandwiched a Lance Stephenson three pointer (2 great shooters miss, 1 bad shooter makes - ugh), and then Dwyane Wade put it on tilt.  On an offensive rebound, instead of catching it he tried to bat it back out towards the perimeter, and it got intercepted.  Then he came down in transition with numbers, had a free run at Hibbert, stopped on the block, didn't find any of the shooters spotting up, then panicked and threw the ball away again.  Then came pushing down the middle with the ball on a 3 on 2 break with James sprinting the right wing, but instead of giving it to him, he slowed the pace, and fed Chalmers for an open three from the wing, which did not go in.  It was a good shot, but a James dunk probably would have been the higher percentage play.  Finally, in a tie game with a minute to go, he waved everybody, including James, off, and took a bizarre run-floater over a strong contest that missed badly.  Such damaging decisions, all of them.  Physical mistakes?  Okay.  Mental mistakes?  Tough to live with.  Dwyane finished with 14 points on 6-14 with 6 rebounds and 5 assists.  He's obviously limited physically, just as he was in the playoffs last year.  That's fine, Miami can live with that.  Gotta play smarter, though.

3) KJ James was unbelievably good (36 points on 20 shots).  You could write 6 paragraphs listing all the plays he made - what did you like better, when he tomahawked Roy Hibbert's layup, or when he took a crucial bump-and-finish over Paul George?  When he drove left then twisted and threw a 28 foot bullet one-handed back across his body for a Mike Mil-lar three, or when he made the 30 footer to end the third quarter?  That's why the last two turnovers were so disheartening.  He's going to feel terrible.  The first one, a set play for a Ray Allen three was fluky, David West just blindly threw his arms into the air and the ball randomly hit them - that ball misses his arm, and its a terrible play by West, who should have been closing out to Allen.  The second one was a rare bad decision by KJ - had Bosh open in the short corner for a three, just didn't pitch it to him, and got stuck with the ball.  But realistically, KJ was the only Heat player who really played well.  The shooters are brutal right now. Shane Battier was 0-3, and Coach Spo finally yanked him after 14 minutes when Battier lost confidence and stopped shooting open shots.  He can't do that - for their offense to work, he must shoot open shots.   Ray Allen was 2-5, but missed both his threes and 2 technical free throws.  He's playing terrible right now, he's not even close on his jumpers.  He and Battier look old - they need to liven it up a little.  Bosh made the big three pointer, but only 6-14 overall.  Emcee Chalmers and Norris Cole were a combined 3-12.  It got so bad that Coach Spo finally inserted Mike Miller late in the second quarter, who instantly made that KJ-assisted corner triple at the buzzer, only to apparently break a rib while doing so, and never came back in.  Good grief.  Last year Miami won the title when James dominated play, and the shooters - Bosh, Battier, Chalmers, Miller - made shots, and an injured Dwyane Wade did a little bit of everything.  In this series James is dominating, but isn't getting any help.  That ball needs to go in.

4) Cheap shots.  There were two huge ones, one by each team, both by the guy on his squad most likely to get nasty: David West, who knocked Mario Chalmers out of Game 1 with a cheap shot illegal screen, sought Chalmers out again away from the ball where the officials wouldn't be looking, and hammered Emcee in the shoulder again with an intentional elbow.  That's what I don't like about West - he's not "being physical," he's trying to injure people out there.  That really shouldn't be part of basketball.  West is the dirtiest player in the league unless you count Ron Artest, which I do not, because in my mind, Artest's behavior is so aberrant he shouldn't be allowed in the NBA at all.  West's not far behind.  He's not going to get suspended, but I am sure he will get fined.  He's not going to stop doing it until the league sits him for a while, though...But, to be fair, Dwyane Wade has always had more than a bit of nasty in him as well, and during his fourth quarter mental meltdown, after one of his turnovers he sprinted back down the court, saw Lance Stephenson in his way, jumped into the air like 1980s vintage Cobra Kai, and belted Stephenson in the ear with a flying elbow.  It appeared to be insane, it seemed clearly intentional.  I don't see how the league doesn't suspend him for Game 3, frankly.  Miami is playing the dirtiest team in the NBA, without question.  I don't think that even the Pacers would deny that.  But it doesn't give Miami the right to sink to that level.  And if you are going to do it, Dwyane, do it to David West, cuz he's asking for it.

5) Speaking of cheap shots, in Game 1, Shane Battier drove to the basket, Roy Hibbert met him at the rim, and as they began to collide, Battier lifted his leg and, well, I guess he pretty much karate-kicked Hibbert in the privates, just as Hibbert smashed down on Battier's head with his arms.  They called a foul on Battier, which seemed like the right call - Hibbert could make a pretty credible case that when he got woofed in the groin, it caused him to keel over into Battier.  Fair enough.  Then Hibbert spent the last two days whining about the play on Twitter, which was funny, that's pretty much the best part of Twitter, when guys wig out on it.  Maybe Battier did it on purpose; maybe he didn't.  I don't know.  What I do know?  Hibbert's nuts are the only thing Battier has hit all playoffs!    

6)

Umm, you know what?  I think I'm gonna pass on the Kia Rondo.  I found the steering irritable, and the brakes unpredictable.  It was fairly decent for short drives, but on anything longer, I often found myself gyroscoping way, way off target.  Also, the floors were littered with dirty fingernail clippings.  I'm going to hang on to my Nissan Chalmers for now.  True, the navigation system is shot, so I often get lost, and I spend a lot of time politely bumping into things, but in tight spots, like high speed highway merging, it usually comes through and, as a bonus, the interior smells like a giant turkey leg.
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Again, last year, we were in this same spot, and we lost Game 3 in Indiana.  Listen, there's not much to it.  A couple of the Heat's shooters are going to start knocking down some shots to support KJ and the Heat are going to win the series; or, they won't, and they won't.  Game 3 is Sunday in Indiannapolis.  If you need me before then, I'll be out four-wheeling in my new Chevy Ibaka.  Have a great start to your long weekend!
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It Ain't No Fun: Dwyane Wade and LeBron James Just Pass Paul George Around For Game-Winners

Dwyane Wade told LeBron James to blow by Paul George for the game-winner because The Dogg Pound said it best, "It ain't no fun if the homies can't have none."



In the last two seasons, both Wade and LeBron have hit game-winners on Paul George.



First up is Wade's assist to LeBron for the game-tying three in regulation on March 10, 2012 (notice how Wade blows by George the same way LeBron did in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals) and then Wade's game-winner over George off his legendary pump fake.

Wade fouled out of Game 1 of the ECF and the message was simple:

"There's nothing else to do with it

Pass it to the homie, now you hit it

Cause he ain't nothing but a bitch to me

And y'all know that bitches ain't shit to me"

LeBron's response was as classic and smooth as Snoop Dogg himself: 

"I'm too swift on my toes to get caught up with you hoes!"

Even after having two game-winners scored on him in consecutive seasons, Paul George still wants more.

PGeorge: "I want to be one of the best players in this league. You have to want that moment and cherish guarding guys like LeBron and Wade..

— Mark Montieth (@MarkMontieth) May 24, 2013

... I'll take that matchup all day for myself. Being on an island one-on-one with one of the league's best players."

— Mark Montieth (@MarkMontieth) May 24, 2013

Paul George had his chance - twice. He needs to move on and let somebody else have a shot. Maybe Lance Stephenson. 

I'm sure Wade is like:

"I'm D-Wade ho

You'll never be my only one... trick ass biiiiiiiiiiiiitch"

LeBron is probably like:

"Now as the sun rotates and my game grows bigger

How many bitches wanna fuck this n***a named LeBron James

I'm all the above

I'm too swift on my toes to get caught up with you hoes

But see... 

it ain't no fun

If my homies can't get a taste of it

Cause you know I don't love em"

So who's the next HEAT player to hit a game-winner on Paul George - Ray Allen? Mario Chalmers?

Dwyane Wade: Best SG in the NBA by the Numbers

How does Dwyane Wade end up 3rd Team All-NBA? Rarely touted, forever doubted seems to be his NBA legacy. A look at the numbers from the boxscore shows Wade was the most productive shooting guard in the NBA this season, despite struggling with rehab from knee surgery and bone bruises.

Kobe Bryant, James Harden and Wade were the top 3 shooting guards in voting for the 2013 All-NBA team. That makes sense. The Houston Rockets, Miami HEAT and LA Lakers led the NBA in production from the shooting guard position this season, based on stats from hoopsstats.com. 



The spreadsheet below ranks all teams by the Win Score per 48 minutes (WS48) they produced at SG this season. Win Score is a stat created by sports economist David Berri to measure NBA players' production. The simple formula is PTS - SHOTS - FTA/2 + OFF.REBS + AST/2 - TOV + DEF.REBS/2 + STL + BLK/2 - PF/2. See the HEAT Produced Page for more information.

What doesn't make sense about the media's All-NBA voting is Wade finishing 3rd among shooting guards despite being the most productive SG in the NBA. Wade only received 145 points in the voting but produced an 8.7 WS48 this season, higher than Kobe's 7.3 WS48 (521 points in All-NBA voting) and Harden's 8.2 WS48 (253 points in All-NBA voting).

Of course, most of the media doesn't use an "advanced stat" like WS48 to measure player production and that's why Wade got underrated. 

Kobe had better numbers than Wade in 8 of 22 traditional stats tracked at basketball-reference.com (per 36 minutes) - games, starts, minutes played, shots made, shot attempts, defensive rebounds, assists and points. 

Harden had better numbers than Wade in 9 of 22 traditional stats - age, games, starts, 3-pointers, 3-point attempts, 3-point shooting percentage, free throws made, free throw attempts and free throw shooting percentage.

Wade's advantage in traditional stats came in 6 areas - overall shooting percentage from the floor, offensive rebounds, total rebounds (tied with Kobe), steals, blocks and turnovers. To make it even plainer, Wade's advantages over Harden and Kobe were shooting efficiency and defense. Defense was an especially big advantage for Wade.

Mysynergysports.com ranked Wade 85th in points allowed per defensive play, Kobe 151st and Harden 322nd. Simply put, Wade was a better defender in the HEAT system, than Harden or Kobe were in the Rockets' or Lakers' systems, and his play on both ends of the floor limited his opponents' production at a far greater rate than Kobe or Harden's play did.

The HEAT led the NBA in lowest production allowed at SG this season at just 1.6 WS48. The Rockets finished 10th at 3.4 WS48 and the Lakers finished 22nd at 4.2 WS48. Since Wade, Harden and Kobe played the majority of minutes at SG for their teams, it's reasonable to assume they played a significant role in the defensive system their teams played against opposing SGs. *For any Kobe fans who want to use the excuse that he defended a lot of point guards this season, the Lakers ranked 17th in production allowed at PG with a 5.4 WS48.* 

The spreadsheet below ranks each NBA team by the production allowed at SG this season.

After combining Wade, Kobe and Harden's own WS48 numbers, with their teammates' and their opponents' numbers, each player's wins produced can be estimated and it becomes clear that Wade was the most productive SG in the NBA.

Wade produced an estimated 11.7 wins this season, Harden produced an estimated 11.7 wins in nearly 600 more minutes played than Wade and Kobe produced an estimated 10.8 wins in over 600 more minutes played than Wade.

The difference becomes even clearer when analyzed on a per minute basis. Wade produced 0.235 estimated wins per 48 minutes (est.WP48) which means he increased the HEAT's chance of winning by 24% every 48 minutes he was on the court. That's 2.4 times more productive than the average SG.

The average player only increases their team's chance of winning by 10% every 48 minutes. The logic is simple - an average team wins 50% of its games and there are 5 players on the court for 48 minutes of an NBA game. See the HEAT Produced Page for more details.

Harden produced 0.188 est.WP48 that increased the Rockets chances of winning by 19% per 48 minutes, which is good but falls well short of the Wade standard. Kobe produced 0.172 est.WP48 and increased the Lakers chances of winning by 17% per 48 minutes, which is great for a 34 year-old but falls way short of the Wade standard set at 31 coming off knee surgery.

This is the brilliance of Wade that gets underrated. Even during a season where the media proclaimed he was falling off, he still gave his team a 5-7% better chance of winning than the 2 SGs the media claimed were better than him at his position.

Rarely touted, forever doubted. That's the legacy of Dwyane Tyrone Wade.

The spreadsheet below compares the stats of Wade, Harden and Kobe this season.

Heat 103 Pacers 102 ot Heat lead 1-0

6 Thoughts

1) The Mario Chalmers shirt is now 5-0 (MARIO CHALMERS SHIRT POWER!!!), but I almost wish we lost tonight.  Can't wash it until we lose; it smells bad, it's a very familiar odor, but I can't quite place it...Hmm...What is that smell?...Oh yeah: it smells like Roy Hibbert's armpit after an overtime playoff loss to the Heat when King James bolts to the rim and makes a layup to win the game at the buzzer!  Yeah, that's what it smells like, I'd recognize that stench anywhere!  A crazy game, with some huge shots, and a lot of lying: let's go, and LET IT FLY!!!

2) There were innumerable ridiculous plays down the stretch of this game.  Paul George heaved in a 30 footer to send the game to overtime, and made a 3 point play in the ot when the ball kind of flew out of his hands into the basket while he stumbled down the lane and a foul was called on KJ James (remember that for a second).  But just as huge was an overtime sweeping Birdman Anderson hook shot attempt, which led to a foul and him line-driving in the 2 free throws, which seemed like the only free throws we made in the game up to that point.  Then a Chris Bosh early-shove off of the constantly clutching Roy Hibbert led to a Bosh put back and foul on George to tie the game late.  Finally, up 2, Norris Cole stole a ball from George Hill, dove on it, Hill dove on Cole and wrapped his leg around Norris' head, dislodging the ball, and Paul George ended up with it and launched another prayer, this time an airball, except the ref called a light brush foul on Dwyane Wade to give George three free throws which, to his credit, he made.  His post-game press conference reaction, though, made it clear he didn't think he got fouled on that play - kind of got a little nervous, made a weird face, and then half-heartedly asserted that he did.  Remember that one, too.  Lying is rampant on that team, of course, we'll get to that in a second.  Finally, with 2.2 to go, KJ James caught an inbounds pass, George pushed up too high on him, KJ blew by him, George tried to re-route his drive with a forearm - the exact same foul that got called on James in ot on George on his stumbling three point play and at least as much contact as on George's three pointer which even he didn't think was a foul -  this time, of course, no call (it's KJ James - he has to finish through any and all contact), but it didn't matter, James layed it in, Dwyane Wade jumped 10 feet in the air off the bench, and the Mario Chalmers shirt, even with it's namesake sidelined with a bad shoulder after back-to-back Hibbert and West cheap shots on him, remained undefeated.  I can save those laundry quarters for the arcade this weekend!

3) We all know Frank Vogel is a liar, it's been proven many times.  It all began last year, when he lied to Heat television announcers Eric Reid and Tony Fiorentino, telling them before the game that they would not play zone defense against Miami because they didn't even have a zone in their arsenal, they had never practiced one.  Halfway through the first quarter: zone.  Then, in the playoffs, he asserted that Miami is the biggest bunch of floppers in the league.  That's obviously not true - no one gets fewer calls than KJ James.  Unless Vogel is an absolute idiot, he knows that's wrong, and he clearly seems to be more "evil" than "dumb."  And there he was tonight, with pretty much every word out of his mouth b.s.  Before the game, he told the assembled reporters: "we don't adjust to other teams' adjustments."  Yet, twice in the closing moments of overtime, with the game on the line, when Miami went small, Vogel took the man he calls "the best rim protector in the NBA," Roy Hibbert (or as Eric Reid derisively called him in the postgame highlights "Ray Hibbert") off the court.  Both times KJ James went right to the rim, got fouled (both uncalled), and made layups.   So when Vogel bragged "we don't adjust to other teams' adjustments," it seems what he meant was, "any time the other team makes any adjustment whatsoever, I like to overreact to it."  Also, I question whether he truly thinks Ray Hibbert is actually the best rim protector in the NBA - if he honestly believed that, wouldn't he keep him on the court for the biggest defensive possessions of the game?  Also, the TNT cameras, with Pacers television crew Reggie Miller and Steve Kerr - wait, what?  They aren't the regular Pacers tv color analysts?  Wow...Anyways, the TNT cameras captured Vogel in overtime telling his team, "I told you we were going to win this game."  Then they lost.  So he lied to his own team, too.  He has no moral boundaries.

4) We already mentioned Bosh's huge three point play in overtime.  He was in foul trouble early, but bounced back with a nice second half, and finished with 17 points on 11 shots.  Efficient offensively.  And he was the reason Hibbert wasn't on the floor to defend KJ's last drive - Vogel said he didn't want Hibbert having to try to contain Bosh in space on the last play, although that was probably a lie, he probably did want that...But Bosh's backup was even more efficient.  Birdman Anderson kept hiding on the baseline, waiting for KJ James (triple double: 30,10,10) to drive, draw Ray Hibbert, then Bird would swoop to the rim, catch, and finish.  He made all 7 of his shots, the two huge free throws, scored 16 points in 18 minutes, grabbed 5 boards, and had three blocks.  The Heat won the battle of paint points 60-48.  A big chunk of that is KJ and Dwyane (a solid 19 on 9-15, 6, 5, and 3) getting in the lane, but the fact that Bosh and Bird both made "big" contributions was a "big" help.  Get it?  They're the bigs on the team.  It's super-late, sorry.

5) We already know Frank Vogel is a pathological liar, and that several Pacers, especially David West, are cheap shot artists.  They're a dirty team.  What we didn't know is that even their front office lacks class.  At the end of the first half, the Pacers' Director of Media Relations, David Benner, tweeted out, "If there is such a thing as Death by Public Address Announcer, I am experiencing it in Miami."  First of all: how dare you take a shot at Heat P.A. announcer Mike Baiamonte?  He's a Miami treasure, and his "dos minutos left in the quarter: dos minutos!" gave this blog its very name!  Second of all, nice job of media relations!  I would assume David Benner's job is to try to make the Pacers look like a professional organization (admittedly, no easy task).  Umm, oops?  Third, I'm sorry you aren't enjoying your time here in Miami - I know, I like Indianapolis a lot better, too.  There's a lot more to do, the weather's better, and there are only white people and no one ever says anything in Spanish!!!  Pandering to the Pacer fan base, I am sure.

6) I love Kevin Durant.  The kid is a great basketball player, and I hated to see him get bounced out of the playoffs so early.  Although, is it fair to point out that no one criticizes him for not having a post game, even though he is 7 feet tall, when before everyone criticized KJ James for not having a post game, even though he's 6'8"?  It's not fair?  Okay, never mind...This week, after the terrible tragedy in Oklahoma, KD gave one million dollars to relief efforts.  Wow - that is amazing.  Love you, KD, and respect that so much.  By the way, guess who didn't give one million dollars, or even one dollar, to relief efforts, as far as anyone knows?  You guessed it: the incredibly unlikable Russell Westbrook.  I, for one, couldn't be less surprised.  You know who else also didn't donate any money to relief efforts?  Frank Vogel.  Although he claims he did.
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Settle in for a tough series, kids.  We'll be back on Friday for Game 2.  If you need me before then, I'll be using a loofah, trying to scrub this weeks-old Chalmers shirt stench off me so that I can go to work.  "I did not have sex with that woman!  It depends how you define what 'is' is!"
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Heat 94 Bulls 91 Heat win 4-1

6 Thoughts

1) Good God.  Dwyane.  Later for you, Bulls.  Sit here and whine for a second, Chicago, while we let it fly.

2) For three quarters, Dwyane Wade was robbing every Heat fan's will to live.  Heat jumped out to an early 18 point lead powered primarily by Mario Chalmers, and my Mario Chalmers shirt (4-0: MARIO CHALMERS SHIRT POWER!).  But the Bulls ground, and ground, and ground some more, and not only caught Miami, but led by 8 points heading into the fourth quarter.  It wasn't all Dwyane's fault, not by a longshot - everyone had stopped defending, moving on offense...everyone had just stopped playing hard, period - but Dwyane looked horrible.  The Bulls didn't guard him on the perimeter, so he kind of bounced the ball back and forth, and would occasionally jack an errant splayed-leg anvil at the backboard.  On the defensive end he had a lot of trouble staying in front of people - always seemed to be one step behind Richard Hamilton, in particular.  When he went to the locker room in between the third and fourth quarters, M.Minutos prayed that he would stay back there.  Instead, he came back out, and won the game.  Playing with a severely hurt knee, while 2011 MVP Derrick Rose watched from the bench with a perfectly healthy knee, Dwyane gutted in back-to-back floaters to give the Heat a 4 point lead with 4 minutes to go, then a minute later extended the lead to 7 on a throwback spectacular tip dunk off a short missed Norris Cole jumper.  With under a minute to go, he out-wrestled Carlos Boozer on an offensive rebound to gain an extra possession for the Heat, and when Jimmy Butler missed an open three-pointer on the last possession of the game, which may have been the first shot he missed all series, Miami moved on to the Eastern Conference Finals.  I've kind of stayed away from Derrick Rose-bashing in the blog during the series.  It's tired, but more importantly, why reverse-jinx him into playing and scoring 35 points?  Still, this game in particular, with his idol Dwyane fighting through pain to win a game, makes Rose look like an absolute zero.  He pooped on his teammates, he pooped on his coach, he pooped on his organization (and stole their money), and I'm sure, at some point during the series, he literally pooped on the Bulls bench.  Simple logic dictates that he had to, he literally never moved from that spot on the bench, at some point he must have had to make a poop.  Dwyane is glassy-eyed on the court from the pain, he looks like he does when he gets the migraines.  It's a given something is really wrong with his knee - the day the Heat's season ends, he goes for surgery, right?  Meanwhile, Rose sits there watching, totally healthy, with a steamy treasure in his diapers.  Why does everyone assume Derrick Rose will play next season?  What changes between now and then?  I'm not a big fan of his approach towards his job.  And, as a final word, deep down every Bulls fan feels exactly the same way, from Steve Kerr and Mike Wilbon right on down the line.  They know their guy punked them.  And it hurts.

3) You know how Miami got back into the game after trailing by 8 to start the fourth quarter?  KJ James, right?  Nah.  He was solid, and played big down the stretch but didn't dominate throughout.  Oh, Chris Bosh?  No, he was pretty solid on both ends, but got limited by foul trouble.  Emcee Chalmers and the MARIO CHALMERS SHIRT?  I mean, he would have, if only Coach Spo would play him in a fourth quarter.  Of course, it was Shane Battier and Norris Cole!  Battier, who along with all the other Heat shooters, struggled mightily in this series, made back-to-back threes, then got fouled on a third try and made 2 free throws.  Eight quick points for suburban dad guy!  Cole created a transition bucket when he pushed the ball as hard as possible, then flipped a perfect Birdy-Oop up over his shoulder for a Chris Andersen jam.  After a bizarre, and extremely rare, double-botched call by Bennett Salvatore and his crew (more on that in #4) threatened to curtail the Heat's momentum, Cole scored his only two buckets of the game, a little wing jump shot, then a fake-wing-jump-shot-curl-down-the-lane-look-Boozer-off-and-jam-on-Joakim-Noah to give the Heat the lead.  Battier - you expect him to come up big in tough spots.  But now Norris Cole is starting to feel a little "clutch-guy-y," if that is a word, which it is not.  Also, I don't believe in the concept of "clutch," really.  But I do believe in being aggressive in big moments, and Norris is nothing if not aggressive.  Starting to love that boy...

4) Any game in which Bennett Salvatore is involved is going to have a lot of really odd moments.  He's not just the worst referee in the NBA, he's worse at his job than anyone except the dude in Cleveland who kidnapped the kids (you're a bus driver, your only job is to get kids from point A to point B safely.  You kidnapped them.  You can't be much worse at your job than that).  There were several different calls throughout the game that Salvatore made which the other two refs (Tony Brothers and Mike Callahan) were forced to step in and change: "sorry, Bennett, but this is an actual game, I have to change that one."  On a Jimmy Butler steal on a pass intended for KJ James, he called a foul on Butler, then after thinking about it post-whistle changed it to a foul on James, then ruled it a clear path foul, which was technically the correct ruling since James was behind Butler, then looked at the replay, realized that neither guy had touched each other, and left it as a foul on James, but rescinded the clear path part of the foul - he screwed both teams on the same call!  But even worse, with the Heat charging in the fourth quarter, James sprinted out with a loose ball, with Norris Cole well ahead of everyone on the other end.  James jumped to pass the ball, and Nate Robinson came flying directly at James, made no play on the ball, went up high, and hit James in the face.  One, it was a blatant flagrant foul - that's what the rule is for, so that you can't do that, so that you can't hit a guy in the face.  It doesn't really matter if you were trying to or not, it's dangerous, you aren't playing the ball, and, by the way, Nate Robinson is 5'8", he literally had to jump up to hit KJ in the face.  Two, I've seen that play called a clear path foul often this season - if a teammate is clear to the rim, and the defender grabs the passer, refs have called clear path.  Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't.  I just read the clear path rule - it's now clear why the rule isn't clear to the refs, because it is poorly written.  It doesn't clearly address a situation like this one.  In any case, one way or another, Miami was sure to get two shots and the ball.  And, it had been ruled a flagrant foul on the court.    Instead, the refs emerged from a twenty minute replay review, during which Bulls fan Steve Kerr, announcing the game for TNT, bitterly complained that James had snapped his head back on purpose - James is running full-speed one direction, Robinson full-speed right at him and punched him in the face, yes, I am sure KJ flopped -  and announced it was not a flagrant foul, just a regular foul, so Miami didn't get the sure layup on the other end, and didn't get any free throws.  Coach Spo asked Salvatore could he go back and look to make sure it wasn't a clear path foul, but Salvatore told Spo that he would not look.  Great, thanks, you bus-driving kidnapper!  We got double-kidnapped, twice on the same play!  In any case, it seemed like it could be a crucial turn of events, but then Norris and Dwyane won the game, and ended the series.  The end.  Epilogue: be prepared for between 4 and 7 games of "Steve Kerr: World's Biggest Pacers Fan" over the next two weeks - all Eastern Conference games are on TNT.  That won't be irritating at all.

5) Cry, Joakim Noah!  C'mon, cry!  I know you want to!  I see the tears welling up in your eyes, you can't hide it behind that girly, tangled mess of hair, you petulant little child!  Cry!  We've played you twice in the playoff and we are 8-2 against you!  Cuhhhh-ryyyyy!!!   You got another technical foul tonight for slapping Shane Battier on a rebound - if my count is accurate, that was your 34th t of the series.  That's a lot of extra points for Miami - thanks!  Wahhhhhhhh!!!

6) Great friend of the blog Snets asks: "A woman was kicked off a flight for singing a Whitney Houston song – what would be allowed?

I did not see this story.  I am a veryyy nervous flier, and a flight can produce bizarre behavior from me.  One time on a trip from Florida to Connecticut, I sang a medley of Huey Lewis songs for three straight hours while M.Minutos sat with her head in her hands from embarrassment (I couldn't stop, I was too uptight).  G.F.O.B. Plumber recently went to a Huey Lewis concert, and it was his second one in less than a year, I believe.  You have to really, really dislike music, and yourself, to do that.  Or, be trapped on a plane for three hours with the complete belief that you are going to plunge 30,000 feet out of the sky and die a fiery death.  In fairness, Plumber was never a huge music guy.  Also, he may or may not have been partially responsible for Davy Jones' death.
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I told you all the Bulls stink, I was right.  Who got the juice now?  WHO GOT THE JUICE NOW???  Pacers series can not start until Monday, and perhaps as late as next Wednesday.  Either way: weekend off!  That series is going to be tough no matter what, but especially with Dwyane so banged up.  If you need me before Monday (or Wednesday), I'll be workin' for a livin'.  Man, I want a new drug.  Long live Dwyane Wade!!
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